“Oh, yeah. Of course. What else could be the reason, right?” Lucy, my best friend understood my situation with Adrianne.
I tried to get my mind of Adrianne and just focused on my studies. Since early this year, I convinced myself to score on all of my ten subjects. I had to make my parents proud of me. They had lost their precious Adrianne along the way. She was not used to be like that. She was so much better than me when she was younger. I never knew what happened to her or what was incomplete in her life. She had everything. Apart from that, people notice her apart from me. They never saw me nor remembered what had I achieved in my life. Maybe that was the reason I could not bond with her. I just could not accept her.
“Annie, we have rehearsal for poem recitation after school, right?” Rendra asked me while we were walking to go to class.
“Yes, I’ll see you after school at the library. Is that alright?”
“Yes, that’s perfect.”
“Rendra, could you inform the others as a reminder for them?”
“Yes, certainly.”
* * *
“Hey Mama. How was your day today? Where’s daddy?” I asked my mother as I kissed her cheek when I reached home from school.
“My day was great and your daddy is reading the newspaper in his office. By the way, is Adrianne home yet?” My mother asked me about Adrianne. That was all she wanted to know every time she saw me.
“Mama, I just got home. I’m not sure if she’s home or not. Anyway, I’m sorry I got home late. I had a rehearsal for poem recitation for this month’s show at school.” I apologise to her for coming home late but she did not notice I was late.
“Were you late? What time were you supposed to come home? My mother asked me as if she was confused.
“School usually finishes at 2 p.m. but I had rehearsal until 4 p.m. and now it’s
already 5 p.m.” I explained to her.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t notice. Could you call Henry for me please?”
Monday, 23 March 2009
Second page
“Mama, I’m going to school.”
“Okay, have fun learning in school. Anyway, is your sister up?” My mother kissed me on the cheek.
“Mama, you know I don’t care about her, right? She doesn’t even care for herself and I don’t think I should care about her. Mama, I have to go now. I love you.” Then, I just left the front door and went straight to the car. Henry, the driver was already waiting for me in the car.
“Okay, thank you. Could you wait up? Your sister needs to go to her college.” My mother gave me a pity look.
“Yes, sure but hurry up.” I was reluctantly agreed with my mother.
After half an hour waiting in the car, my sister, Adrianne, finally came out of the house and got in the car.
“Good morning Annie.” She said in a very sleepy voice.
“Goodness, you stayed up late again last night, didn’t you?” I gave her an annoying look and then I turned back to the window.
“Henry, it’s already 7.45 a.m. I’m late. Could you speed up?” I turned back to Adrianne and realized she already fell asleep. I just ignored her.
As soon as Henry reached the school, I got out of the car and thanked Henry for sending me to school. Then, I hurried myself to the front gate but the prefect took my name for being half an hour late.
“Henry, just drop me at the studio. I have practice there with the band.” Adrianne demanded.
Henry has to obey her or else the situation could get worse as Adrianne was a hot-tempered person. She could burn down the car and just leave Henry to die. Adrianne was very different from other normal teenagers.
* * *
“Hey, Annie! You’re very late this morning. What happened?” Lucy asked me in a worrying tone.
“Well, same reason. Adrianne.” I told her the same reason and the only reason why I am late for anything. It was always Adrianne.
“Okay, have fun learning in school. Anyway, is your sister up?” My mother kissed me on the cheek.
“Mama, you know I don’t care about her, right? She doesn’t even care for herself and I don’t think I should care about her. Mama, I have to go now. I love you.” Then, I just left the front door and went straight to the car. Henry, the driver was already waiting for me in the car.
“Okay, thank you. Could you wait up? Your sister needs to go to her college.” My mother gave me a pity look.
“Yes, sure but hurry up.” I was reluctantly agreed with my mother.
After half an hour waiting in the car, my sister, Adrianne, finally came out of the house and got in the car.
“Good morning Annie.” She said in a very sleepy voice.
“Goodness, you stayed up late again last night, didn’t you?” I gave her an annoying look and then I turned back to the window.
“Henry, it’s already 7.45 a.m. I’m late. Could you speed up?” I turned back to Adrianne and realized she already fell asleep. I just ignored her.
As soon as Henry reached the school, I got out of the car and thanked Henry for sending me to school. Then, I hurried myself to the front gate but the prefect took my name for being half an hour late.
“Henry, just drop me at the studio. I have practice there with the band.” Adrianne demanded.
Henry has to obey her or else the situation could get worse as Adrianne was a hot-tempered person. She could burn down the car and just leave Henry to die. Adrianne was very different from other normal teenagers.
* * *
“Hey, Annie! You’re very late this morning. What happened?” Lucy asked me in a worrying tone.
“Well, same reason. Adrianne.” I told her the same reason and the only reason why I am late for anything. It was always Adrianne.
Tuesday, 17 March 2009
MY ENDLESS LOVE BY SHAZWANY
It is a cold, breezy night. I walk for hours in this silent street. There is no one here and nobody there. What happen to this town? This town has turned from somewhere magnificently beautiful to somewhere, I find very empty. Just like my heart. I am still looking for that something missing and making my life miserable. Everyday I am searching and never had I found any. Perhaps my walk in the lonely street will make a difference. I got everything; wonderful parents, success, a great career, caring friends, the loving one and my two beautiful children. I have everything but why am I not happy? Maybe having the things I dreamt for since I was a teenager were not enough. Maybe I had to have things that I did not plan to have. But what is it? I have changed; physically, mentally and spiritually. I need to change myself to be a better person. So I did since few years back. The changing to be another person took a long time. It did not occur spontaneously. On the other hand, there was a story behind the changing of the new me.
It was a story that neither upset nor excites me. I just thought it was my lifetime story. The changing of me changed my life. And right now I still keep on thinking and asking myself whether I made the right decision or not. I tried to convince myself, I am very happy in my life but the truth is I do not know what happiness is.
My walk along the street that used to be part of my life, Kajang, brought me nowhere and I stop at a place where I start to shape myself, my high school. It is my favourite place in the world to visit for a long time. This was the place where I start what I am right now. A place of learning and a place I share my joy with very caring friends. I made a history to this school. I am really proud of that. While I am thinking of my school days here, my phone rings.
“Hello.”
“Hey, when are you coming home? Where are you?”
“Oh, yeah. It’s getting late. I was just going for a walk and stopped by at my old school.”
“Well, hurry up and the kids are asleep. I’m getting worried here. So, I’ll see you at home.Bye.”
My dear Ammarre called. He is my true friend, true love and loving husband. My days with him get more wonderful each day. He has made my life in the foreign land so much easier. Without him, I think I will never make it through the challenges there. Well, to succeed anything, it costs a lot of effort. When there’s a will, there’s a way. I never regret to have him in my life. Even though having him does not make my life so perfect, he has made a different in my life. Since we studied together in London, he helped me with so many things. I appreciate him very much.
* * *
It is a cold, breezy night. I walk for hours in this silent street. There is no one here and nobody there. What happen to this town? This town has turned from somewhere magnificently beautiful to somewhere, I find very empty. Just like my heart. I am still looking for that something missing and making my life miserable. Everyday I am searching and never had I found any. Perhaps my walk in the lonely street will make a difference. I got everything; wonderful parents, success, a great career, caring friends, the loving one and my two beautiful children. I have everything but why am I not happy? Maybe having the things I dreamt for since I was a teenager were not enough. Maybe I had to have things that I did not plan to have. But what is it? I have changed; physically, mentally and spiritually. I need to change myself to be a better person. So I did since few years back. The changing to be another person took a long time. It did not occur spontaneously. On the other hand, there was a story behind the changing of the new me.
It was a story that neither upset nor excites me. I just thought it was my lifetime story. The changing of me changed my life. And right now I still keep on thinking and asking myself whether I made the right decision or not. I tried to convince myself, I am very happy in my life but the truth is I do not know what happiness is.
My walk along the street that used to be part of my life, Kajang, brought me nowhere and I stop at a place where I start to shape myself, my high school. It is my favourite place in the world to visit for a long time. This was the place where I start what I am right now. A place of learning and a place I share my joy with very caring friends. I made a history to this school. I am really proud of that. While I am thinking of my school days here, my phone rings.
“Hello.”
“Hey, when are you coming home? Where are you?”
“Oh, yeah. It’s getting late. I was just going for a walk and stopped by at my old school.”
“Well, hurry up and the kids are asleep. I’m getting worried here. So, I’ll see you at home.Bye.”
My dear Ammarre called. He is my true friend, true love and loving husband. My days with him get more wonderful each day. He has made my life in the foreign land so much easier. Without him, I think I will never make it through the challenges there. Well, to succeed anything, it costs a lot of effort. When there’s a will, there’s a way. I never regret to have him in my life. Even though having him does not make my life so perfect, he has made a different in my life. Since we studied together in London, he helped me with so many things. I appreciate him very much.
* * *
Monday, 2 March 2009
Last sunday, it was a horrible day. i lost someone special in my life. he is a good person. i cant believe he is not here anymore. i cant believe i wont be seeing him again. its shocking when he is gone just like that. no goodbye, no words. he is my history teacher. actually, he was my history teacher. may he rest in peace.. :',(
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